tread marks to prove it

I was run down by an 8-year-old Swedish girl on a bike. She had pigtails. That is all.

Alas, homosexual earwax

TORONTO - While gay Potter fans around the world were rejoicing Monday about Rowling's outing of the kindly Dumbledore in New York late last week, others were miffed that she didn't make his sexuality more obvious throughout the blockbuster series and questioned her motives in doing so now, months after the final book was published.
"I'm a gay fan and I'm not amused," Griet Verlinde, a 26-year-old psychologist from Belgium, said on the AfterElton.com blog.
"Firstly, how very 'nervy' of her to out him after all the books have come out and it won't harm her sales," she wrote. "Secondly, not a single rumour of this in the books. Nothing."
Predictably, right-wing Christian groups in the United States have also weighed in following years of assailing the "Harry Potter" series due to its focus on witchcraft. This time, Rowling's alleged crime is making homosexuals seem normal and kind-hearted to young readers.
Scott Dagostino, managing editor at Toronto's Fab Magazine, scoffs at the naysayers, saying Rowling did a courageous thing by making it clear to stunned fans at Carnegie Hall on Friday that Dumbledore is gay and was once in love with Grindelwald, something he says was long suspected anyway by some canny Potter fans.
Potterheads have pointed to lines like this one, from "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows," as providing clues to Dumbledore's sexuality: "'You cannot imagine how his ideas caught me, Harry, inflamed me."'
"I think she was being very funny and quite brave in not backing down from these people."
Dagostino said Rowling did nothing wrong in keeping Dumbledore's homosexuality subtle.
"Part of the theme of the books is the fact that the adult world is very secretive. Book by book, Harry Potter finds himself drawn into these adult machinations, and Dumbledore is presented as a man of great secrets, so this just adds one more layer to him," he said.
But Verlinde finds the out-of-the-blue revelation to be suspect.
"The timing does indeed seem odd," she said in an e-mail exchange from Belgium. "Rowling said: 'Oh, Dumbledore's gay' in response to someone asking if he ever found true love ... my question is, would she ever have told us if that question hadn't come up? When?

(From The Canadian Press) http://canadianpress.google.com/article/ALeqM5gmduahDx6L90QoVrA_g5tqh-xBQA

IDK My BFF Dennis

If you thought the most dramatic show on NBC was airing on television, you are sadly mistaken. The plot of this new online drama involves menacing text messages. Do they use ALL CAPS? Is there a menacing emoticon? Perhaps X-(.

This is So Bad it Can Only be Amazing

Bono and The Edge co-wrote a musical. Specifically, Spider-Man the Musical. Julie Taymor is attatched to direct. I'm thinking one part Lion King, one part Joshua Tree, and an entire cast clad in organic cotton courtesy of Edun.

From Playbill News:

The character breakdowns provide some insight to plot points as the character Arachne ("female, 20-35 years old, any ethnicity") is described as "a beautiful, boastful young woman turned into a spider for her hubris and lack of respect for the gods. She subsequently appears to Peter Parker and the audience as in turn a powerful spider-woman who comes from another time to inspire Peter; an otherworldly lover; a bride; a terrifying (and sexy) dark goddess of vengeance; a dance partner in a charged and violent spiders dance of death; and, finally, a lonely, fragile young woman." Casting is seeking a "strong Celtic, Balkan style, e.g., Sinead O'Connor," noting, "outside the box ideas are welcomed. Could be someone from the music industry."

Also, a "Geek Chorus" consisting of "three teenage boys and one girl" are described to "meet to ritualistically retell the greatest Spider-Man stories."

Decline of newspapers may lead to starvation

Just when Internet newspaper sites appear to be gaining ground as replacements for printed editions, a 70-year-old woman identified only as Maggie told the Edmonton (Alberta) Sun in September that her paper edition of the Sun is a crucial part of her daily diet, literally. She eats it, in strips, and has, she said, for the past seven years because it tastes good. "I can't explain it," she said, and it was only when she recently experienced a blockage of her esophagus, and doctors found a ball of paper, that she revealed her obsession. Doctors cited by the Sun said that except for the blockage danger, newspaper eating is not unhealthful. [Edmonton Sun, 9-5-07]

Crimes of passion

Catherine Delgado, 35, was arrested in Annapolis, Md., in August after she appeared, smudged with fudge, in a hotel lobby around midnight with "large slabs of fudge bulging out of her pockets" (according to a Washington Post story). A police officer later checked a nearby Fudge Kitchen store and found the door inexplicably open and a large display quantity missing from the front window. (Police said alcohol was involved, along with fudge.) [Washington Post, 8-3-07]

Remedy for low blood pressure

Pentagon investigators discovered in August that a small South Carolina company fraudulently collected $20.5 million in shipping costs, including one invoice of $999,798 for sending two washers (cost: 19 cents each) to a base in Texas. According to Bloomberg News, the Defense Department was said to have a policy of automatically and unquestioningly paying shipping bills labeled "priority." [Bloomberg News, 8-16-07]

Get excited

"Why write this book now? Stephen fears America has lost its balls. He hopes to re-ballify us. Even the ladies. Ladies can have balls — lady-balls. Stephen likes to call those "Thatchers." Stephen will show how he got his mammoth swinging sack, with tales of courage and vital documents from his own life: the Mother's Day card he made at age six, disputed credit card bills, putt-putt score cards — all the major milestones." (From the Publisher's comments.)
And there is an audiobook, read by Stephen himself, who evidently goes off script occasionally in in the abridged audible version. Those crafty devils are trying to get me to buy it twice. It will probably work.

Bog Butter

This is so strange that I just thought Fred Pippin should know...
"Bog butter" refers to an ancient waxy substance found buried in peat bogs, particularly in the United Kingdom, especially in Ireland. It can be found buried inside some sort of wooden container, such as buckets, kegs, barrels, dishes and butter churns. It is a hydrocarbon of animal origin, also known as butyrellite. Until 2003 scientists and archaeologists were not quite sure of the origin of bog butter. Scientists working at the University of Bristol discovered that some samples of the "butter" were of adipose/tallow origin while others of dairy origin. It has been proposed that bog butter has been formed by food products buried in an attempt at an archaic form of refrigeration, as the peat creates a hygenic seal around the buried matter.
In Scotland, the practice of burying bog butter dates back to at least the 2nd or 3rd century. Ireland is home to the oldest recorded find of bog butter; a carved hanging bowl dating back to the 6th or 7th century AD. (From Wikipedia)
More bog butter info (because really, I needed several legitimate sites to make me believe this:
Bog Butter article
24hour Museum
New Scientist

Whelmed by Heroes

I am just plain whelmed by the Heroes premiere.
I was:
a little afraid of Nathan's beard.
very afraid of the voice in Molly's head, which may be Veronica Mars?
annoyed with Claire's teen angst, but that is to be expected.
confused as to why Nathan looked much scarier in one mirror than the other.
wondering why the Scottish thugs were stealing a barge full of iPods? Did I hear that right?
worried that Hiro is going to undo the space time continuum, but intrigued by his new British friend.
definitely not going to cross Maya, who seems to 'spode peoples brains when she gets scared.
Also, this episode, and all future episodes should include more shirtless Peter.
Only on a blog this serious am I willing to include these most profound insights.

At the risk of becoming a Leno segment

This blog seems to be morphing into a Tonight Show "Headlines" segment, but I just can't help myself. These Google sponsored links are delightfully odd.
According to LA Outback, Apnea - a temporary suspension of breathing - can be cured by playing a Didgeridoo - a musical instrument of the Australian Aborigines made from a long wooden tube.
I stand corrected. This is potentially true.
http://www.laoutback.com/didgeridoo/education/Didgeridoo_and_Sleep_Apnea.html

Who wants my kidney?

(As of May 27, 2007) BBC News reports that a Dutch TV station says it will go ahead with a program in which a terminally ill woman selects one of three patients to receive her kidneys. It's a reality TV competition and the winner gets an organ - from the creators of Big Brother. First reaction: Ew. Second reaction: A little proud that this horrifying idea is not making its debut on American television. Go USA! Nothing makes me more patriotic than finding out the Dutch are crazier than we are.
Read the BBC article

Horcrux in a blender

Watch as this crazy man blends an iPhone. Yup, in a blender. Try to forget that it's disgusting that someone destroyed a phone that costs a month's rent long enough to watch this entire clip. The phone turns to black smoke at the end, which experts believe to be a little piece of Steve Jobs' soul. This explains why Apple products are so much better. They are made with dark magic, and each iPhone is actually a horcrux. Maybe if Bill Gates was willing to do this that Zune thing wouldn't have been so lame.

Because we're too cool for Webster's

Three Super Amazing Uses for Urban Dictionary

1. Putting the UD Word of the Day on your blog. This will make both your blog and vocabulary infinitely classier.
2. Looking up awkward-gross things guys say.
3. Typing in your name and pretending the lovely and/or hilarious things written there are about you. For instance, the contributors:

Tricia-"an amazing girl, who has great qualities and features." Contributed to the UD by a classy guy named Dudegor

Elly-according to UD Elly is "Coolest biatch in the fricken world my partner for life" not mine actually, some guy named Rick. Rick then proceeds to write "will you marry me i will love you forever until death do us part" (italics are Rick's, not mine). I'm hoping this isn't Rick's actual proposal. UD is cool, but not really an appropriate venue for major life choices. Also, I'm not a marriage proposal connoisseur but I think I speak for women everywhere when I say we appreciate good grammar and a lack of creepiness.

Becca-1.Cooler than cool, makes you laugh about anything
2. a buffalo to end all buffalos
A lovely two part entry from someone called Cooleo that includes an anecdote involving a badger and a baby mouse to illustrate the term buffalo. Notice that I did not choose Charlie S's entry "to be hit in the face with an artificial penis."

Everything was beautiful at the ballet...hey

Who would have thought that Emily Gilmore's childhood angst would be such an appropriate score for the cast of House?

Greetings from Nantes

Whee! Does this mean I can contribute to your blog, Bobeda? or should I start my own? ..hmmm..... Well, in any case, life is good and I miss you dudes.

Again with the google bots

Why does this google sponsored link from Gmail think I am Tony Bennett? And why did he win so many Emmy's? And why were the Emmy's in the round? I am full of questions tonight.

Sometimes I wonder if the robots at Google have a sense of humor, particularly the ones that assign the Google ads. What keywords from the This Day in History prompted Google to assign this ad?

Texas Techno from a West Wing Fan

Texas indie musician Art Conway just released an album featuring songs inspired by "The West Wing", including one, Shibboleth, which Conway dedicates to Aaron Sorkin and his mom on the his site. "A John Spencer friend" features the a man falls in a hole story from "Noel", the Holiday episode from season two. The songs feature electronic sounds at a less than migraine inducing techno beat and few if any lyrics. It's available to download for free at http://www.tacoscott.com/art/deadlast009 .
You might need to hear it to believe it.